- Dragon Ball Z Forum
- →
- The Lounge
- →
- General Discussion
- →
- Question for you guys..(Relationships)
| We hope you enjoy your visit to this forum. If you are reading this then it means you are currently browsing the forum as a guest, we don’t limit any of the content posted from guests however if you join, you will have the ability to join the discussions! We are always happy to see new faces at this forum and we would like to hear your opinion, so why not register now? It doesn’t take long and you can get posting right away. Click here to Register! If you are having difficulties validating your account please email us at admin@dbzf.co.uk If you're already a member please log in to your account: |
| Question for you guys..(Relationships) | |
|---|---|
| Tweet Topic Started: Mar 20 2016, 03:49 AM (708 Views) | |
| + QueenTD | Mar 20 2016, 03:49 AM Post #1 |
My Dear Melancholy,
|
This doesn't have to do with me. But I recently got a dm this guy talking about issues with his gf having male friends. I have his permission to C/P him just don't use the names and make it general. But I'm curious. What do guys think about their girlfriend having many man friends or even more guy friends than girl. Obviously there's a trust factor and a little discomfort as you know least 2 wanna....get in them pants(or already have). But what are your guys thoughts about it? From Google searches I understand both female and male point of views. And have y'all ever... experience this or been one of the friends of a taken person?
|
 Spoiler: click to toggle
| |
 |
 
|
| + Pyrus | Mar 20 2016, 04:11 AM Post #2 |
 
|
My woman is friends with most of her exes (at least on FB), but I'm not worried since they're all married or in a different country. I wouldn't want her hanging out with a bunch of guys in real life, though. I'd have to veto that s*** because I know the mind of a man. |
|
Spoiler: click to toggle
| |
|
|
| + Pelador | Mar 20 2016, 04:16 AM Post #3 |
Crazy Awesome Legend
|
I don't give two s***s so long as I am at least getting some every night from the b***. Just gotta hope the skank doesn't give me aids. |
 http://www.youtube.com/user/jonjits | |
|
|
|
|
|
Mar 20 2016, 04:16 AM Post #4 |
|
This is a complicated issue because it relies entirely on the people involved. If you're 100% committed to your partner, and all of your best friends happen to be the opposite gender, I don't see a problem with that at all; however, it becomes an issue when there are feelings and attraction involved because--to be honest--people love attention. This girl may surround herself with guy friends because she loves to be desired. It empowers her and makes her feel special. That doesn't make her a bad person, but it's very common to see a woman surround herself with men because she wants to feel desired (and men can do the same thing, of course.) If I were involved with someone who had friends exclusively of the opposite gender, I would gauge the situation. Were there past tensions or feelings between my partner and any of these people? How does my partner act around these friends? How long have they known each other? It truly varies depending on the situation and your partner's personality. It should be pretty easy to determine the truth behind everything if you know your partner well enough. Personally, I've never dated anyone like this, and I would be a bit skeptical of dating someone like this. I know plenty of women who only hang out with men that desire them, and it's a bit irritating to me, but it's not my life and therefore none of my business. |
|
|
|
| peep | Mar 20 2016, 04:49 AM Post #5 |
 
|
If she constantly makes plans to do things with guy friends I'm never allowed to meet then I'd probably have an issue with it. For example, my best friend is a woman who surrounds herself with guys and has even told me she loves being the only female in a group of males, but her boyfriend knows all of them and they're all friends and he knows she wouldn't do anything iffy so he doesn't have a problem with it. I think I would feel the same way if I were in his situation |
 thx accelerator for the sig it is my first sig ever and i love it and i love u 
| |
|
|
|
| Zoom | Mar 20 2016, 06:14 AM Post #6 |
|
You completely trust her or you don't trust her, a guy that's single (or married) is going to try to get into her pants soon or later if your girlfriend is hot. This is where I like my woman to speak her opinion, if another guy is trying something i like a woman that isn't afraid to get up and get out, i don't like it when the woman is too afraid because the other guy is your friend or whatever. |
|
|
|
| * Mitas | Mar 20 2016, 11:34 AM Post #7 |
It truly was a Shawshank redemption
|
The whole 'I know her guy friends would want to bang her' argument doesn't really make sense since at the end of the day it comes down to whether she wants to 'bang' them, and that's where the trust comes into it. If you are in a relationship with someone who has many, or entirely, friends of the opposite sex, you have to weigh up your own paranoia/insecurities against the trust you place in that person. If the paranoia/insecurities win out, then the relationship won't work. That being said, if that does happen, it doesn't mean you failed the relationship or you were in the wrong for wanting to dictate your partners friendships, it just means that you and that person weren't meant to be together. You just don't click together in a very important area of a relationship. If something like this really does bother you and you don't feel like you could make a relationship work this way, I'd always advise bringing it up with your partner and discussing it like adults. They may understand your feelings and you might be able to work it out. if they do blow up on you about being jealous or controlling (obviously if you actually are being controlling i.e. I demand that you do this, that's different) or whatever, again, you probably aren't meant to be with that person. |
 "Then you've got the chance to do better next time." "Next time?" "Course. Doing better next time. That's what life is." | |
|
|
|
| + Pointer | Mar 20 2016, 12:34 PM Post #8 |
...
|
I have experienced the worst case scenario two times already. They were with their friends... males mainly. And then I got dumped. Who knows what might develop between two ppl, especially if they are together more time than they are with their partners. |
| |
|
|
|
| + Clearin | Mar 20 2016, 01:55 PM Post #9 |
|
What exactly are you supposed to do about it? Tell them you don't want them hanging out with people of the opposite gender? That sounds insanely controlling and most people would dump you if you tried to treat them like that. You can't just tell people who they are or aren't allowed to be friends with just because you're paranoid. You want to end potentially years of history with deep emotional connection just because you're scared she'll f*** one of them? Something might happen, but if she's willing to cheat on you then she's obviously not that great of a person in the first place, with or without male friends. I have a female best friend, so I can easily imagine what it'd be like for a girlfriend to say they didn't like me having female friends, and losing all my female friends would remove a lot of great people in my life. I feel like people who honestly request that you don't be friends with the opposite gender just imagine othe humans as nothing more than NPCs in video games, who don't have feelings and basically don't exist when they're not part of their own life. Edited by Clearin, Mar 20 2016, 10:01 PM.
|
| |
|
|
|
| Buuberries | Mar 20 2016, 03:53 PM Post #10 |
No
|
i agree with mitas and clearin. if it's that much of an issue then there are obviously trust and/or insecurity issues. i mean yeah it's not easy: ive had female friends and best friends and guys have gotten jealous of me before; likewise, the people ive been with have had male friends, but it only really bothered me when we fell out and she'd go to one. it was worse when i was like 16-17, but i guess i got less irrational as i got older. ultimately, that element of trust has to be there; even if it is, however, it's easy to ruminate over all the what ifs, but the best thing to do would be to try to think of it as an outsider and realise when you're assuming things and making illogical conclusions about what your partner's doing. that, and a lot of self-confidence to have that one little part of you to know that you'll be okay if things don't end well. |
| ¯\(°_o)/¯ | |
|
|
|
| Sam | Mar 20 2016, 08:48 PM Post #11 |
It takes a mere second for treasure to turn to trash.
|
Pelador, a little respect please.  And with my ex, actually like, all of her friends were guys. I knew them all to a degree though and liked them. She even went swimming one on one with a guy that's a player at my old school. I'm not sure if I trusted her because of the amount of affection and because of the fact that she seemed immensely satisfied with our sex life, or I was just apathetic. I'm still not sure to this day. I think she thought I might think it was weird once and I just told her I trusted her. Who knows though, she slept with my best friend, like, immediately when we broke up. I know we weren't together but it does make me a little suspicious. Edited by Sam, Mar 20 2016, 08:49 PM.
|
|
WoW Legion Ending - Thank you Darker for making this into one, big incredible gif! <3 | |
|
|
|
| peep | Mar 20 2016, 09:34 PM Post #12 |
|
one of the many perks of only having female friends. never gotta worry about one of them trying to do that unless theyre lesbians |
|
thx accelerator for the sig it is my first sig ever and i love it and i love u
| |
|
|
|
| + Steve | Mar 20 2016, 10:30 PM Post #13 |
Greetings. I will be your waifu this season.
|
I think it's definitely situational. I wouldn't really be a fan of it because I know what men can be like, many enjoy the act of taking a girl away from another, getting all soppy and making the girl think there's something between them. Trust is probably the biggest word here because it works in a circle. You might trust her and she might trust you... But she probably also trusts her friends. Would she tell you if one of them was really flirtatious with her? Probably not if they're good friends. Then what if you have a typical relationshippy argument or something, she seeks the innocent comfort of friendship, he brings alcohol and dishonest intentions, s*** happens. It really depends I'd say. There's being trusting or insecure but then there's also being stupid or too comfortable, not knowing someone is making moves on your girlfriend. I don't get why the person who's feeling a bit insecure is almost always made out to be the bad guy in these situations... Like even if their significant other does cheat or their friends genuinely are trying to bed them they're made out to be a controlling c*** most of the time. Doesn't security go both ways in a relationship? If it's not obvious you're a faithful person it's hardly bad of someone to feel a little worried. If you go out with strange men/women for hours and hours with no contact with your partner it'd be weird if they weren't wondering what might be happening, particularly in a relatively knew relationship. |
 Definitely not a succubus, fear not | |
|
|
|
|
|
May 3 2016, 02:24 AM Post #14 |
|
Anymore opinions? I think this is an interesting subject. |
|
|
|
| + Pyrus | May 3 2016, 04:47 AM Post #15 |
|
Sure, why not? A big reason I don't trust a guy around my woman is because of the place I work and the people I've interacted with in my city. Relationships mean nothing. Marriage means nothing. You want that pussy, you get that pussy however you can. You want that dick, you get that dick however you can. There is so much cheating going on you'd think it's a porn universe. I have no reason to trust anyone with testosterone and a penis (or estrogen and a vagina for that matter, but I'm not concerned about that side of the fence with this one). I trust my mate more than I've ever trusted any other partner, but it doesn't ease my severe urge to defend my territory. Edited by Pyrus, May 3 2016, 05:13 AM.
|
|
Spoiler: click to toggle
| |
|
|
|
| 1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous) | |
 Join the millions that use us for their forum communities. Create your own forum today. Learn More · Register for Free |
|
| « Previous Topic · General Discussion · Next Topic » |
| Track Topic · E-mail Topic |
 4:41 PM Jul 13
|
Theme Designed by McKee91
Powered by ZetaBoards Premium · Privacy Policy