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| Cheating in a relationship (& cheaters) | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Apr 1 2015, 12:49 AM (6,335 Views) | |
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Apr 1 2015, 12:49 AM Post #1 |
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A topic about cheating and cheaters, concerning a relationship: What do you consider cheating and not cheating? How do you feel about cheaters and their ways of cheating? Have you ever been in a cheating situation? How did you handle it? How did/does it make you feel from whichever side you were on? Were you able to see the signs, or gave them away? Early or too late? Cheating. Edited by Professor Gohan, Apr 1 2015, 01:24 AM.
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| SSJ | Apr 1 2015, 01:21 AM Post #2 |
 
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Don't have much experience with cheating, but I think it's a disgusting thing to do. If you aren't happy in a relationship, at least end it before looking for a new partner. If I'm ever cheated on in the future I can assure you I would never speak to the cheater ever again. |
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| Rockman | Apr 1 2015, 01:22 AM Post #3 |
hoighty-toighty
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A topic about cheating and cheaters, concerning a relationship: What do you consider cheating and not cheating? Kissing, sleeping with (no sex), sleeping with (sex), touching the person sexually, getting drunk at that person's house regardless of what did or didn't happen, chatting with the other guy through messenger regularly like my ex did How do you feel about cheaters and their ways of cheating? Is one of the worst things you can do to someone you said you once loved. I wouldn't wish it to happen to anyone and I hold very little respect to the people who do it. Have you ever been in a cheating situation? I have not, nor will I ever. I will break up with my partner long before it even becomes a question. My ex cheated on me and lied to me about it when I confronted her. She waited a full month before telling me and it just went down hill from there. I have pretty bad anxiety attacks as it is, and this was a constant 24/7 anxiety attack for at least 5 months straight that I could not control. It altered my state of mind permanently and I have issues trusting anyone now. How did you handle it? How does it make you feel from whichever side you were on? Because I was in such disarray from the anxiety attacks, I stupidly clung on to the 8.5 year relationship hoping things would get better. They didn't and they got worse. She continued talking to him through the end of it when she broke up with me on New Years Eve. Left me that night too. Even after I pleaded to her to stop talking to him. She told me she wasn't going to and lied to me about talking to him from then on. Were you able to see the signs or gave them away? Early or too late? I saw some signs. I confronted her about how much she talked to him 2 months before it happened. She denied anything was going on. Until one night when she went to visit a female friend of hers midday, and I didn't hear from her until 10am the next morning. Even then she hid it from me and lied about where she'd been. I snooped on her Mac and found something that looked like evidence, confronted her about it and she lied to my face about it. A month later she told me the truth. |
 JAke is a copyright of Spazo and Pickle Flavored Fudge Pops inc. | |
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| + Pyrus | Apr 1 2015, 01:28 AM Post #4 |
 
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Cheating is anytime you give someone else what should be reserved for only your current partner. For the most part, that boils down to intimacy, but it can be affection in general. Cheaters are weaklings. If you can't commit to one person, don't waste that person's time in the first place. Self-control is essential, and cheaters lack that trait. Once they've cheated, they have it in their minds for good, like a bear who's gotten a taste for human flesh. Never have I cheated on someone. I came close at one point in high school, but I held back. There have been many a time where I could have indulged and sent someone to Pound Town, but it's not who I am. I'm keeping a clean record. I've been cheated on once for sure, and other times where I couldn't prove beyond a reasonable doubt that I was being cheated on. The one I knew for sure, she admitted it to me about a week or so after she'd done it. She had gotten together with one of her male friends, they drank, and they had sex. I was perturbed by the news because it made me realize she wasn't putting in 100%, she didn't care enough. She was most likely drunk when we talked about the situation, like she was for most of that relationship. I wouldn't be surprised if she went ahead and cheated on me again after that (because I stupidly didn't end the relationship right there like I should have). I knew she would cheat eventually because she had broken my trust and taken me for granted several times before, and the fact that she wouldn't cut back on the drinking (which makes her very sexual) around shady people. The signs were there from incidents in the past. Her pants-on-head logic that ignoring me would make the pain of not being able to see me go away made it even worse and didn't help the suspicions. The most pathetic part about that is she had been cheated on before, so she knew how it felt, and yet she went ahead and did it to someone else anyway. Edited by Pyrus, Apr 1 2015, 01:37 AM.
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| Buuberries | Apr 1 2015, 01:39 AM Post #5 |
No
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i feel like emotional affairs are just as bad as physical ones |
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| olliebalollie | Apr 1 2015, 01:46 AM Post #6 |
 
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In my opinion, it depends on you and your partner. If the general definition of cheating is having sex or kissing someone else behind your partner's back,then what about about kissing someone on screen [if you're an actor]? What about threesomes if you and your partner both agrees? In my opinion, I don't classify cheating as an physical thing your partner does [i.e kissing, sex], I think cheating is going behind your partner's back. Off course I don't like and would not like my girlfriend to kiss or have sex with other guys while we are dating, but in my opinion, I think the definition has to meet most people's standards, because if you say cheating is my man having sex with another woman, what about couples that enjoy threesomes - 2 guys and a girl or 2 girls and a guy?
If my definition of what a cheater is meet, then I hate them. I understand if people are drunk and its a mistake because you're not thinking straight, but players and b***s deserve a spanking.
Yes, when I was studying at Uni I didn't give my girlfriend my full undivided attention, and she was upset and hurt, so she started seeing some other guy trying to get my attention. I told her to go uck herself. I know... I was young and I didn't handle it well. |
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| + Pyrus | Apr 1 2015, 01:47 AM Post #7 |
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They are. When you're not the first person they text in the morning or the last person they text at night, when you're not the only one they're giving googly eyes to, when your texts are being responded to unusually late, when your calls are being ignored, when you're unable to spend as much time with your companion, it's a ridiculously draining experience. It's tricky, ain't it? Is it really not cheating if I invite another girl into the bed and the one I'm currently seeing is okay with it? I would disagree. You drank, you put yourself in that position. Edited by Pyrus, Apr 1 2015, 01:51 AM.
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| + QueenTD | Apr 1 2015, 02:22 AM Post #8 |
My Dear Melancholy,
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What's cheating? Depending on the relationship. If it's an open relationship when y'all seeing each other but maybe got someone on the side to fall back to then cheating is different. It's more complicated. I guess it wouldn't be cheating since it's no official. If it's a sex buddy relationship then there's no cheating unless the sex buddy is who you cheating with. In a committed relationships cheating would be Kissing, f***ing, *Sucking and Eating*, holding hands (DEPENDS), and going around behind person back. What is not cheating? When you're in a long distance relationship. You tend to..see other people but not to a major degree. I'm not a huge fan of this as it hurts doing it and hurts seeing your partner doing it. So most couples tend to break things all. How to feel about Cheaters and ways? I don't have an opinion on cheaters that I'm allowed to say without breaking my nice streak. Especially in a committed relationship. It's one of the worse things ever. Thinking about my boyfriend cheating on me makes me sad. Imagine what the real deal feels like. Some people aren't cut out for relationships. If that's the case just don't have one. Just have sex buddies or one night stands. Even friends with benefits. Cheating is sneaky. Because the person knows that they're wrong or scared to hurt feelings. My favorite type of cheater are the ones who blame it on the partner. "I cheated on you because of you! It's your fault!". Cheating situations I've seen cheating(My best friend cheats on her boyfriend all the time) that makes me sick, I've seen reactions (I've never seen a male cry so much. He was a muscle head to. Made it worse), and seen couples argue that BOTH cheated on each other. It's not a pretty place. How I handle it? Stay outta it. However with my best friend I actually scold her for it. But it doesn't work. She just keeps cheating and targets boys with girlfriends or older men with wives(20-36). She even caused a divorce(34 year old man after 6 years of marriage) The Sighs Sneaking Lack of communication "Opps I forgot we had to hang out" I ran into my ex "I'm hanging out with my friends at a place for single people" It's not you it's me Hiding stuff. What's an Emotional Affair?
I don't believe this. If you're at a party or club and you drink. You're bound to cheat do to your surroundings. If you're at a bar then don't act single or drink too much. There's a saying that alcohol brings the truth out. I'm not saying you can't have fun and drink. But have your partner with you(who doesn't love drunk sex that you can't remember) or don't put yourself in a position. Edited by QueenTD, Apr 1 2015, 02:27 AM.
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| + Pyrus | Apr 1 2015, 02:31 AM Post #9 |
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An emotional affair is when you're basically in a relationship with someone else, but there's no physicality involved. Does that make sense? I'm clearly not the best at explaining things. |
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| + QueenTD | Apr 1 2015, 02:33 AM Post #10 |
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My Dear Melancholy,
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I found out. Yeah that's when you're heart isn't in it no more. Which can be painfully I guessing. |
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| Wolf | Apr 1 2015, 02:37 AM Post #11 |
Shadow Realm >
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I've chrated but it's never been done to me. You feel guilty for a little bit then get over it. After that it's off to doing it again |
 me&dingo Shadow Realms Future
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| + QueenTD | Apr 1 2015, 02:39 AM Post #12 |
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My Dear Melancholy,
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....Did you cheat on a long term relationship/committed relationship or it was casual dating and you just cheated. You said you do it again. So you're a repeated offender... Do you cheat on everyone? I'm not judging just curious. |
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| + Steve | Apr 1 2015, 02:52 AM Post #13 |
Greetings. I will be your waifu this season.
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Sorry but what's wrong with this? Do you mean literally sleep or what? Not sure what's inherently bad about that unless they're naked and cuddling or something.
Any non platonic intimacy with someone else.
While I understand the joys of exploring ones sexuality and wanting to have sex with multiple people within a relationship this should be purely consensual.
Sorta, I've been "in a relationship" with a couple of mysteriously busy girls that never bothered to come out and see me who were always at parties and whatnot. Basically a relationship through texting then they'd suddenly turn out to still have feelings for an ex or something which is code for "Yeah we had sex at that party gonna get with them again" So kinda, if what I had even qualifies as a relationship. It felt s***ty, I wanted to kill myself wasn't in a good place at either time and thought each girl was the only good thing that'd ever happen to me then they do that but claim they still care about me etc etc. I was far too naive and thought they actually cared about me so not until it was extremely obvious they didn't. I don't understand the logic of those who feel that by cheating on their partner they're somehow winning and making a fool of the person, only yourself ya clatty. |
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| + Pelador | Apr 1 2015, 03:22 AM Post #14 |
Crazy Awesome Legend
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I don't think it's the worst thing in the world but it certainly ruins any trust you ever had between each other. |
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| Wolf | Apr 1 2015, 03:25 AM Post #15 |
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Shadow Realm >
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Yeah once in the long term. I dated a girl for about 5 years and cheated on her once in high school. I didn't f*** the girl, I just dated her because having two girlfriends seemed cool at the time. They found out about one another and became friends, thus making my life hell. As far as casual, yeah I've had a few side pieces while dating, just one nighters and s*** like that. It's a bad trait but, I haven't really ever met a girl that I wouldn't do that to. |
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me&dingo Shadow Realms Future
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