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| Ever been in love? | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Aug 6 2010, 01:14 AM (795 Views) | |
| + Pelador | Aug 6 2010, 01:14 AM Post #1 |
Crazy Awesome Legend
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I very rarely believe myself to actually be "in love" with a person. It's a very complicated emotion and I find them difficult enough to understand as it is. I often struggle to determine whether I'm merely obsessed with a person or just really like them or actually in love. I think without getting to know someone quite well, you can't really be truly in love. Only interested in them and attracted. It's later on that a person falls in love. Love at first sight is just a physical attraction. Not real love. But I think I have been genuinely in love with a person once. Maybe I still am, I'm not sure. Unfortunately a real relationship would never work plus she doesn't have the same feelings for me as I do her. I'm not even sure she even thinks about me. I'll get over it when I meet someone else. Point is, out of all the times I've believed myself to be in love with someone. My feelings for her seem to be the most genuine. |
 http://www.youtube.com/user/jonjits | |
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| ryanson209 | Aug 6 2010, 05:08 AM Post #2 |
MAGICAL GIRLS REPRESENT
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I was in love once, but she woke up half-way through. Haha. But yeah, I'm in love with my best friend, and thus can't tell her. Ah, such a beautiful cliche. |
 Life is a performance, and the world is full of critics. Give it your all like it's your last show. | |
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Aug 6 2010, 07:03 AM Post #3 |
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^ What an immature and vulgar joke. There are two people that I have genuinely loved in my life. I know the feeling of love because I have had no family, and the feelings I had for these two people in particular were highly distinct from the various ways I've ever felt about anybody else in my life. I grew up with one true friend; he was the only family I ever had. When the one ear that's there for you your entire life is gone, you realize just how much you loved that person. I swear to you, to this very day, there has not been a single individual moment that hurt me as badly as losing his friendship did. I cried over him for two damn years before I started getting better at letting go. I still haven't let go though. I would have swallowed my pride- no; I would have let him spit in my face if he wanted to. He just wouldn't listen to me though. But it's a thing of the past, like I said. In any event, he is one of two people that I loved, the other person being romantically involved with me. That one hurts like a mother *****er too, but I still speak with her regularly. I'm trying to work something out. I just don't understand any of this. I stood by those two so closely, and both of them forsook me. |
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| * -Zero- | Aug 6 2010, 07:48 AM Post #4 |
Black Knight
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Well I love my mom, my sister, my uncle, my two baby cousins, and my best friend yeah. But if you meant as in love romantically I can't say I have, I haven't even had my first kiss to begin with so for me to say I loved someone without ever getting close to them no I have not, there have been girls I have had a big crush on, but as its said big crush. not love. I really want to find out how it feels to be in love romantically hopefully with time I'll find out |
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| Sam | Aug 6 2010, 08:19 AM Post #5 |
It takes a mere second for treasure to turn to trash.
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In my life, the only person I should love is my Mom, I guess. In a few days comes a very painful anniversary. I've been romantically in love twice, I believe. One was a bit desperate, one has been just foolhardy... back in 6th grade, I sat next to a girl who I never had any sort of attraction to, ever. I was beat with ice balls until my head began to bleed and went into a concussion at my old school in Chisago and all the kids hated me and told me I was going to be the 40 year old virgin and that I was useless and fat and always swore at me and stuff. She was the only one to ever listen to me. It was pathetic, but, I fell in love with her for this simple fact. I just obsessed over the one person who I thought cared about me. It was a twisted love, but, love nonetheless. My mom loved me, yeah, but, my brother was always causing crap around the house, getting drunk and high and whatnot so my mom, in between working a lot, had to spend what free time juggling home activities, precious little recreational time and dealing with my brother who caused major problems for us back then. I was just the kid that sat alone in his room all day. I felt like nobody was there for me. I would cry myself to sleep at night back then wishing somebody would help me. Nobody did. In Freshman year, I became aware of the presence of another girl at my new school (I moved here in 7th grade) that was FAR different from all her friends. She was part of the popular cliche, but, she seemed a lot more genuine. She's beautiful in many ways, and I easily become fascinated with people like this. I surround myself with friends of all different types, personalities and social standings from the kids people think are weird and disrespected to Jocks and "cool kids", just because I value certain traits in them as individuals. It was the same for her, I became infatuated with her. Unfortunately, I had no self confidence. I mean that quite literally, none. She had been single for a long time, and I instead encouraged my clinically depressed, loose cannon friend Brandon to go after her. I tried hard to help him succeed where I couldn't. In a way, I used him as an extension of myself. He failed, however. I failed. I finally lost weight and started to talk to her over the summer on Facebook every night for a few hours. During Freshman year, we talked a lot because we were both concerned about Brandon and his mental status. I finally felt myself and started to come out of my shell to her. I was at my dads' house on August 13th, 2009, when I went on Facebook on his laptop. We were hanging out in his living room when I saw that she was in a relationship suddenly with some guy that was a bit of a douchebag and I never saw her talk to. For some reason, I started shaking and sweating a bit. My dad noticed and I quickly excused myself to the bathroom. My dad has promised sobriety and that he was a changed man. My first memories as a child were of him swearing and being violent with my mother and threatening to kick us out and calling my brothers racial expletives, chasing them around the house drunk with a beer bottle, screaming. He always was lying and bouncing back on his word. I finally started to break through, not only with her, but, with my dad. I finally felt like I was moving forward. I was so devastated by her dating this guy that I was in my dad's bathroom, freaking out for half an hour. Out of idleness, I opened up his cupboard and found drugs hidden in the back. I began to panic again as I confronted him. So many emotions at once. I hated myself. It was all my fault. I failed myself by not talking to her, and I had been fooled once again by my fathers' lies. I hated him, but, my entire life I yearned for his acceptance, for him to truly care about me. But he never did, he lied to me. I felt like an absolute failure because of her too. I couldn't stand it. I spent all of sophomore year in her study hall, we talked every day that she didn't have to leave for something and I stood up for her when nobody else would when her "friends" were talking **** about her. Twice. I was the only one to actually take action. She's no longer friends with them because of what happened. A lot of stuff unfolded. She also sent me some mixed signals, flirting and such, but, the barrier of her boyfriend was a constant firewall for me. I became sucked into World of Warcraft because of severe depression and suicidal thoughts. I couldn't accept that everything I had worked for was gone. Every day I saw them together. Perhaps, I fell in love with her simply because of who she is. Or perhaps I was never in love with her at all, I only feel this deep seated pain and regret of looking at her and her boyfriend every day and feeling misery and pain, knowing I failed, like I always did. The only two people who I wanted in my life, the missing pieces, would be lost forever. I let myself down again... Who else is to blame but me? Maybe, I'm weak. Maybe, I've always been. Maybe, I just deserve this. I lost them both in one, fateful night --- August 13th, 2009. Any chances I had with her, gone. His lies once again fooled me and crushed me just as he had done over the years. Just like when he told me he was dying of hepatitis, just like when he told me he got in a street fight, just like every night he called me up drunk and kept calling me, I was crying, trying to ignore the calls as I attempt to fall asleep, sometimes, wishing I wouldn't even wake up. Misery gripped my heart that day and it laid latent for many months until around second quarter in school, when seeing them together so much and forcing me to re-live that night over and over and over again forced me into World of Warcraft. I wrote angry letters every day, wondering what was wrong with me. People noticed that I was constantly exhausted. I went from fantastic grades to failing Algebra II, I went from being happy to a shell of my former self. I still don't really know anymore. A painful anniversary dawns. It's quite poetic, almost. She'll be celebrating one year of happiness... and I'll be at home, alone, as always, thinking what could have been. What had I done to fail them so? What unfathomable crimes had I committed? I beg myself for an answer in darkness, and I hear nothing back. Eventually, I was forced to quit World of Warcraft because I knew it had destroyed what was left in my life while only covering up everything else. Now... I look upon ruins... the aftermath of an apocalypse... with nothing left. I don't even know who I am anymore, or what I want. The future is in pure darkness, the unknown, the void. The past is full of pain. Even though I'm no longer suffering from physical and peer abuse like I was back in Middle School, I still go to bed at night, wishing I knew someone was there. Wishing my father would come in and wish me goodnight. Wishing he hadn't destroyed our family, wishing that in some way I wasn't alone. Wishing I could call her and tell her how much she meant to me and how every time I was around her, I felt like I wasn't so weak, like the things that had happened weren't my fault. But, every night I get the same response... silence. The sun rises, but, I still live in the shadow. Edited by Sam, Aug 6 2010, 08:42 AM.
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WoW Legion Ending - Thank you Darker for making this into one, big incredible gif! <3 | |
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| Bouncefox | Aug 6 2010, 10:45 AM Post #6 |
"What's this? More wolves hungry for the blood of Almire?"
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Oh my God. That post made me cry. I...really don't know what to say in response to that, except to answer the topic. I doubt I've actually been in love. Sure, I love my family, but not with another person. I've had three crushes so far. One was a tall kid in my band class. I hardly knew him, I really don't know why I held feelings for him. I really don't. This crush has passed, though. My second crush was on a friend. I eventually told him about it, but he just sort of nodded when I said something. It kinda made me sad, but we still continued to walk together to classes we shared and all that jazz. And then he fell in love with someone else... ...A good friend of mine. I felt heartbreak for the first time, and it threw me into a state of sorrow for a good month. I actually almost killed myself over it. But, I eventually convinced myself that it's not worth to take my life over a trivial issue such as the one I'm facing now. (Yes, it's still going on). Eventually, this sorrow turned to anger, which is what I'm facing as I type this. I think I have a good chance of losing two friends. Third crush was on a Senior. We recently became friends, and had a blast playing video games together. I later found out that he had a girlfriend. Again, I felt a little heartbreak, but it wasn't as bad as the first experience. My crush is slowly passing for this friend, though. So, it's not really an issue. It does make me sad, though. |
Try this, you might like it. | |
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Aug 6 2010, 03:28 PM Post #7 |
 
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This topic is good for venting I suppose. Well in my 17 years on this Earth I have had plenty of crushes here and there but I have only been in love twice. I was whipped on my first love for 3 years but she never wanted to be more than friends. It would've been fair to say that I was obsessed with her, but not to the degree where I was stalking her or anything. During this three year period I turned down a few offers from girls that probably could've made me just as happy but I was determined to win her over so I held out. Unfortunately she just didn't want a relationship like that with me so it was all for nothing. My second love was with a sweet girl I met in my first year of highschool a year after the first girl I mentioned, she is one of those girls I'd rather call beautiful than hot because she is both sexy and classy at the same time. You see during the four year period when I was whipped for my other friend this girl expressed her interest in me, I didn't think nothing of it until one day she groped me under the table in class then I started to put two and two together. Of course me being an idiot at the time decided not to act on it because I was still in love with the other girl. Fast forward 4 years later and the tables have turned as I am now crazy over her. I am attracted to her looks and her personality(no I'm not just saying that I actually mean it lol). She is a stunner and could pretty much get any guy she wants, you'd think someone like that would be stuck up and snobby but not her, in fact she helped me out when I was in a really dark place. I am forever grateful for her friendship except now the only problem is I want more, I want to be her boyfriend. She is in a relationship with some clean cut pretty boy and they just celebrated their one year anniversary. Whenever I see them I wave at her and smile like I'm happy but truth be told it hurts me to see them together. EDIT: Maybe I'm too young for love. Edited by Y2J, Aug 6 2010, 03:29 PM.
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| Nusu | Aug 6 2010, 05:50 PM Post #8 |
Piccolo Daimao > Piccolo Jr.
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I´ve been in love 3 times, 2 Ex-Girl Friends and my sweet heart right now <3, Love is a diffcult thing indeed, You open your heart to somebody, And if she/ne goes... she/he breaks it. |
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Once upon a time, there used to be a signature. Then it got lame, and now I'm out of options for a new one. | |
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| * Light | Aug 6 2010, 06:46 PM Post #9 |
Yo
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I was in a relationship for over 2 years, but even at the time I knew it wasn't love. After she split with me, I basically spent a lot of my time with girls I didn't really care about or found interesting, looking back i'm pretty ashamed of how I acted. Then I met a brilliant woman, who was married. So no, i've never been in love, but i'm not in a rush to find love or anything, I think a lot of people spend too much time trying to force what should happen naturally. |
 
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| ryanson209 | Aug 6 2010, 09:37 PM Post #10 |
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MAGICAL GIRLS REPRESENT
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Like you've never made one of those before. Love is a complicated emotion -- one I am not sure I can properly articulate my experiences or claim that they were really "love." Besides the one I already briefly stated. However, all of your stories make my heart beat abnormally. It's so beautiful. 
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Life is a performance, and the world is full of critics. Give it your all like it's your last show. | |
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| * Mitas | Aug 6 2010, 10:05 PM Post #11 |
It truly was a Shawshank redemption
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I've never been in love, nowhere close. I've had infatuations, crushes and the like, but I haven't had a proper girlfriend since I was 12/13. I can honestly say that I do not understand love, which is probably down to the fact that I have never experienced it (romantically of course, I obviously love my family and friends). I'm actually strangely nervous about finding my first love because I really don't believe I'm cut out for it. But then again, being in love could change these negative aspects of my personality, so we'll just have to see. |
 "Then you've got the chance to do better next time." "Next time?" "Course. Doing better next time. That's what life is." | |
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| Sam | Aug 6 2010, 10:38 PM Post #12 |
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It takes a mere second for treasure to turn to trash.
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I honestly can say everything I typed up here is stuff I've kept in so long. I'm glad this topic was made. Helps me vent out my feelings, even if there is no real solution. |
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WoW Legion Ending - Thank you Darker for making this into one, big incredible gif! <3 | |
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| + Pelador | Aug 7 2010, 12:22 AM Post #13 |
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Crazy Awesome Legend
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Yeh, I see a phsychiatric nurse just to vent my emotions and talk about things and it's really helpful. He's opened my eyes to some things as well. Like how I often say stupid things on Facebook and it makes me look "special" So I stay away from that now. My attention seeking behaviour went to far and I nearly had a breakdown. A girl was partly responsible for that. I just wanted to have a bit of fun with her and make her laugh occassionly but then I started believing what I was saying and it wasn't funny anymore. For a while I thought I might be in love with her but now I realise I just liked her as a friend. Doesn't help when she's texting me at 2:00am saying stuff about how she hates her boyfriend and wants to leave him and how I'm really nice and she wished she had a boyfriend like me. I later realised it was all bull***** and she was more two faced than a conjoined twin connected at the hip. So I don't talk to her anymore. Probably used to laugh at me behind my back too. *****. |
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http://www.youtube.com/user/jonjits | |
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| * -Zero- | Aug 7 2010, 08:50 AM Post #14 |
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Black Knight
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@ Neci how I know some of those feelings too well , especially since I have an awful father as well, and no self confidence and was in deep state of depression not that long ago actually. And as I type this I think I'm starting to set myself up for another deep state of depression (nothing to do with the forum but other things going on) but I'll try to be stronger this time this is why I work out a lot more now and try to keep myself busy somehow so my thoughts aren't on things that I tend to depress over. I can't say I know how you feel one hundred percent because we are two different people and you had different issues you were with weight what I was with height, I was always the shortest guy around and no one made me forget it either I was reminded everyday about my height and my ears for that matter. All I can say is find something to do physically or something to take your mind off of things and at the same time know that if your future is darkness now, that means you're the light that's missing in it. @Bounce Fox- Never think of suicidal again over a guy, for one its not worth it, and secondly you're still too young to be concerned with such things as love, leave those worries for when you're older. People change weather they like it or not, so if for example you started going out with a guy right now, he could be a very different person at eighteen. I didn't change much as a person through my life but I've known people that changed a lot the smallest of changes in a person can change everything in a relationship |
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Thanks to Kid Buu for the sig! The story where DBZF Members are the characters! DBZF:The Unknown Conspiracy POSITIVE ZERO PRODUCTIONS ZeroGuild Forum! | |
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| Bouncefox | Aug 7 2010, 02:02 PM Post #15 |
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"What's this? More wolves hungry for the blood of Almire?"
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I realized how stupid that choice was, and vowed never to consider suicide again. No matter how sad I am. I didn't want to mess with love during my Freshman year, but this crush turned into an issue, and I'm forced to deal with it. At least now I know what heartbreak feels like, and I probably won't be as sad if my heart is broken again. Yes, this friend has changed very much. He's turned into a lovesick fool, and I'm beginning to hate him. I'm strongly considering taking my friend's advice and just cutting the ties with him. (Ties of friendship, that is). |
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Try this, you might like it. | |
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